The Heart of a junky

I use to say 'why do addicts not just put there stuff down and walk away'. Well I can know say I can completely understand that you just can't stop and walk away.

Once when I was in the hospital I was afraid that the nurses would not bring my calcium fast enough and when I am jonesen for a Ca fix need it. I called my 'suppler' in the middle of the night and my husband snucked a jar of ca pills in to my room. I hide them in MY SHOE. I needed the security of knowing that I could get it at a split second if needed that I hide CALCIUM (a mineral) in my shoe so no one would find it. That night was my first clue that I a may have issues with needed ca ariund me. And trust me I stash them EVERYWHERE.

Without this simple mineral that I never leave home without I can go into tetany a large charlie horse. That is what these hands are starting to do. With more time it will be all over and hard as a rock. My heart beat feels like a rock crushing into my chest and breathing gets harder. Sadly most ERs want to give us insulin thinking we are diabetics.

How I became a junky!

You have four parathyroid glands behind your thyriod on your neck. These four glands regulate calcium in your body. Most peolpe know that calcium is needed in the bones for strength what they do not know is that we need calcium in our blood as well. These glands release PTH which tells your body to absorb or release calcium. So I have no PTH in my blood to to tell my body what to do with the calcium. So if I don't eat enough calcium I crash. My body goes into one large giant charlie horse and my heart stops. Why? Because calcium is needed for muscle contraction and relaxation. This really sucks and has screwed up my life and know you get to read all about it.